Sorrows and Regrets

It didn't use to be like.
I didn't use to be this bad.
. . .
so similar.
My writing style - the quality -
has decreased as of late.
it may be because i seem to be
incapable of writing while not
under the influence of my red mistress.
less thought into each word, each piece, each punctuation,
and eventually,
all my work has become like free verse.

When will i write for real again?
with real emotion, and feeling, and thought?
i've lost it.
it has escaped me. whatever talent (hah) i ever
possessed has left me.
without a "goodbye"
and i struggle (with great effort)
to breathe life into my work again.

It's gone. long gone.
and i apologize
for these trespasses on your time.
these . . .
useless
worthless
words.