A cool summer's eve

Rage, anguish, and finally self pity.
This is what I have become - what I have chosen to be.
I could force a smile and brush the black cloud off my shoulder;
stomp it into submission, stuff it in a sack, and throw it out to sea, but
it is much easier to let it encircle me. Rest my weary head upon it's shoulder
and let the sadness and anger consume me.
It is all I am
For now.
Until the rain grows tired of my face and finds the next lonely wanderer to drench in its
misery. And then I will be free from this and from me.
The sun will shine again and I will let its warmth engulf me.
But for now
the sun's brightness burns my skin and I hide in the shadows where it is safe
and familiar
and cold.
The sun is not my friend today
but maybe tomorrow . . . maybe tomorrow I will let some light shine in my bleak soul.
For it is all within my grasp, but for now
for now
I choose despair as my companion on this cool summer's eve.

Deep enough to scar yet not deep enough.

Midnight yearnings

My eye lids are attached to cement blocks pulling them closed; all I want is sleep and yet I resist
the urge and valiantly struggle to keep my eyes open.
Lying in bed, I listen to you breathe. Soft musical notes float in the background
and I long to float along with them
wanting them to reach over, pull the covers up to my chin, and sing me softly to sleep
and yet my eyes are still open.
Insomnia - my long lost friend. Where have you been all these sleep-filled nights?
We were so close, but have grown apart. And now you have found me again - wrapped me in your encompassing embrace; you kiss me gently on my cheek.
and all I want is sleep.
And all you want is me.

(Because you are me and I am you). This one's for you,
like all the rest; just for you my love.

Sitting, thinking of you (with arms - outstretched
waiting for you) while words swirl round my head
and heart (to come home to me) trickling; down
to my hand and out: through the ink in my pen (with
a smile on your face) and I. sit here hoping - the
words will sort themselves out into, a fashionable
order with the punctuation in. their places and express
(and a loving embrace) my feelings of love and
adoration. (never letting go of me) to you - but after
every word has arranged itself, will it make sense
will they ? be able to show you how much you mean
(starring into each other's eyes) to me, my love. My
lover. My soul. My soul mate. (knowing what the
other is thinking)

all da way down

Drowning in the darkness of my doubt.
The depth of this dreariness dissolves my dearest dreams and divorces me from my desperations. The devastating, dirty demon death denounces my disposition and delivers me down to the desolating, devouring dampness.
Demur.

Scene through my eyes:

A mirror reflecting everything before it
and here I stand
waiting to be reflected outwards.
A slight shiver ripples across the otherwise smooth glass surface:
a ripple in time; a glance
into another world.
I reach out to tough it, but it slips
from beneath my fingers and dissolves
back into the unblemished glass
leaving no trace.
Did I really see it? Or did I imagine it?
Was it ever actually there?
A ripple of space on my mirror
another universe perhaps.
But now vanished.
I start to walk away, but sneak one last glance
over my shoulder. Perhaps it is shy and has returned now
with my back turned.
But no.
No evidence of that world shows.
Just a plain glass mirror and me.

The Protector (incomplete)

With his night light shining down upon the bed, he dives beneath the warm flannel blankets, wrapping them tightly around himself. He reaches out for a sign of security and his small frightened hand claps around a warm fuzzy paw. He yanks his tiger underneath the bedsheets with him, eternally grateful for the watchful eyes of his fearless pal. Liam knows that the monsters beneath his bed are no match for Tyler the Terrifying. Even now, he could hear them whimpering and shivering out of fear.
"Hah!" Liam shouts, "Not so tough against a ferocious tiger!" Tyler gnashes his teeth to scare them further and make sure they wouldn't dare even to peak out from under the bed, at least not while he's at Liam's side.