My Hands

I raise my weak, swollen hands to my reddened cheeks in a feeble attempt to stop the mournful tears from falling. My bloodshot eyes burn like scorching candle wax dripping on my hand. My short nails bitten off to my fingertips scratch my soft, fragile face causing a trickle of blood to grace my sullen cheeks. I bring my left hand to my parted lips and savagely bite down on the skin surrounding my fingernails. Pain erupts from my fingertips as I try to mask my inner turmoil with the physical pain of ripping skin. I tightly grasp the throbbing finger in my other hand and bite my lip trying to prevent my eyes from bleeding with tears.

:-( :-( :-( :-( :-(

My small, childish hands gracefully soar across the paper, gaily creating colourful swirls with the bright paint smeared across my soft fingers. I create serene circles of paint with my delicate fingertips elegantly racing across the white page. A peaceful sigh escapes from my gentle, pink lips as the beautiful colours seep from my joyous hands onto the page. The seemingly endless circles enchant me as I stare into their centers. They mystically dance across the page chasing after my waiting hands.

=) =) =) =) =)

I slowly and cautiously lift the fork clasped firmly in my tired hand to my mouth. The nauseous aroma causes bile to rise in my swollen throat. I attempt to choke down the burnt chards of tofu and quickly take a gulp of milk from my cold glass to rinse the horrible taste from my mouth. I stretch my sore, sickly hands across the hard, wooden table and glance down at the disgusting meal on my plate. The sight of the wretched food blurs my vision so I tightly grasp the table trying to regain my balance.

:-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[

Sitting at my desk, I nervously drum my fingers, waiting for the dreaded Calculus test. I anxiously raise my tense hand to my mouth and chew the last remnants of white from my ragged fingernails. Mr. Vertolli places the blank test on my desk. I grab my pencil with my rough, dry hand and look down at the empty test before me. A sigh of relief escapes from my lips when I realize I know how to answer the first question. My hand rushes excitedly down, writing out the solutions to all the questions. I pause when I reach the last question. All my previous doubts and worries return to me. My red, cracking hands shake as a wave of panic comes over me. My mind is blank as I repeatedly read the question. I wipe my forehead with my sweaty hand and swallow nervously. :-[